she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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