But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
