spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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