It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
