Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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