i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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