I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
