i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
