i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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