I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
