You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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