for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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