There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
her vagine was all disorganized.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
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