It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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