help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
