I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
did you just send me my own nude
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
