you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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