new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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