im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
