New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize