Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize