He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize