last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
