K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
