He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
No subtext here. People are naked.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
