I feel like I'm in dance class right now
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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