it hurts more in the daytime
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
