Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
