Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize