Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
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