She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize