Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Randomize