p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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