Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Semen is not good for contacts.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize