I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
