i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
