I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
