Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I want a musical about memes.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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