Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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