You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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