drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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