Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
