It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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