Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
