2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
smell my finger.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
