I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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