I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
