If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I look better un-naked...
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
