i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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