I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
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Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
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Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?