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• (602): View more from Arizona

  well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better

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• (850): View more from Florida

  I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

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• (347): View more from New York

  last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake

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• (407): View more from Florida

  I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.

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  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?

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• (713): View more from Texas

  He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!

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