What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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